Here we are ladies and gentlemen, to your left is ugly, to your right is does not match, behind us is what was I thinking, and upstairs is where the really rejected goes to hide. We are in the belly of the beast. Please, hold small children by the hand and stay with the group–this is no where to be alone.
We will be passing out garbage bags. Your job is to fill the bag with the broken and useless remains around you. Please do not multitask as the monsters around will vie for your attention rendering you paralyzed.
Once we finish we will be doing a second pass. Please follow the signs which will be visibly posted:
This is not a drill. I repeat this is the real thing. Please follow directions and we will all get through this together.
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Decorating Rut Part 1, Organizing and Fear
