“Help me … help you,  Help me…help you”.

Ever see Jerry McGuire where Tom Cruise (Jerry) a sports agent is begging his one and only client Tod Tidwell (Cuba Gooding, Jr.) to help him understand how he can, well help him better?

Well this is me about your chandelier.

Chances are…you need a new one.

Did it come with your house?  Was it part of the builder package?  Did you buy the house 3 years ago and say to yourself this chandelier must be replaced asap and yet you find yourself still with it?  Is it shiny brass?  Was it shiny brass?  Was it popular in the 80’s?  Is it hung flush with the ceiling?  Is it teeny tiny and you have a big dining room?  Is it a ceiling fan?  Is it missing?  If you answered yes to any of these questions, Help me..help you.

Retro is only cool if this is your first time around experiencing it.  If your chandelier is in style now for the 2nd go around after 3 decades of it NOT being in style–you are a “yes” and it must go.

If you are saying (and I swear I cannot help myself) SHOW ME THE MONEY as to how you can afford to buy one, let me tell you Home Depot and Lowes have many very affordable ones.  And I have been known to take down a chandelier or two and spray paint them.  You would be amazed what a can of spray paint can do.

Here are some chandeliers that…(again, sorry) “…had me at Hello”.  (The small print to this statement is they had me at hello as long as they were located at a convenient big box store and were priced between $120 and $180ish).

 

Home Depot

 

 

If you saw the movie, remember the scene with Ray, the little boy with the big glasses, and Jerry on the couch?

Ray: D’you know that the human head weighs 8 pounds?

Jerry Maguire: Did you know that in a typical home with a 8 foot ceilings a chandelier should hang 30 inches from the table?

Ray: D’you know that bees and dogs can smell fear?

Jerry Maguire:  Did you know to properly size a chandelier to your space, measure in feet the length and width of your room and add the figures together? Take this number and use it in inches to determine the diameter of a chandelier that will fit the space.

Ray: D’you know that my next door neighbor has three rabbits?

Jerry Maguire: I… I can’t compete with that!